A different perspective on life, growth, and what really matters.
Well, I did it. I turned 50!
And I have to tell you, this birthday came with a whole lot more emotions than I expected.
I'm not going to pretend that I'm exactly where I thought I'd be at this age. I'm not. There are things I thought I would have accomplished by now, dreams I thought would have become reality, and a picture of life at 50 that looks quite different from the one I'm actually living.
And if I'm being completely honest, that's been difficult to come to terms with.
But something else happened along the way.
I started discovering who I really am.
A Year That Changed Me
This past year has challenged me in ways I never imagined.
There have been difficult days, unexpected obstacles, and moments when I questioned whether I was making any progress at all.
And some of those challenges are still very much a part of my life today.
But when I look back at the woman I was a year ago, I barely recognize her.
Not because everything has suddenly fallen into place, but because I've learned just how much I'm capable of handling.
I am strong. I am resilient. I am capable. I am knowledgeable. I am learning. I am growing.
And perhaps most importantly, I've learned that even the hard days don't get to win.
Learning to Let Go
One of the biggest changes I've noticed in myself is that I no longer feel the need to prove every little thing to everyone.
I used to feel like I needed a good explanation for every decision, every opinion, and every boundary.
As though being myself wasn't enough unless someone else understood or approved.
Not anymore.
I'm good at some things. I'm not so good at others. And you know what? That's perfectly fine!
I don't need to be everyone's version of perfection, personally or professionally.
Sometimes, things simply are what they are.
And there's a tremendous amount of peace in finally being comfortable with that.
Finding Joy in the Little Things
I've also discovered how much happiness can be found in the simplest parts of everyday life.
Spending time with my family. Enjoying a quiet moment at home. Taking care of the little space we've created together.
And, of course, there's recent addition of my Cozy Plant Headquarters! 🌿
What started as a small collection of succulents has become something I genuinely look forward to every day.
I'm learning how to care for them, watching them grow, and yes, occasionally helping a few recover when things don't go quite according to plan.
But more than anything, they've given me something that's just mine.
A place where I can slow down, breathe, reflect, or simply enjoy a few quiet moments without needing to accomplish anything.
It's peaceful. It's cozy. It's space. And it's mine.
I've realized that not everything wonderful in life needs to be big, expensive, or extraordinary.
Sometimes, it's right there in front of us. We just have to make room to enjoy it.
Learning That Adjustment Isn't Failure
If there's one lesson I wish I could share with the woman I was a year ago, it would be this:
Relax!
Not everything deserves the amount of stress you're giving it.
Life doesn't always work out the way we planned. Sometimes, the path changes. Sometimes, we have to rethink our expectations, adjust our plans, and try something completely different.
And I've learned that adjustment does not mean failure.
Sometimes, those adjustments lead us somewhere even better than where we originally intended to go.
I'm still working toward so many things I want for myself, my family, and The Cozy Ledger.
I haven't arrived at some magical destination where everything is easy and all my goals have been accomplished.
But I'm no longer measuring my progress solely by how far I still have to go.
I'm learning to appreciate how far I've already come.
Three Little Words: We Made It!
When I think about the next five or ten years, I don't have a perfectly detailed picture of what I want life to look like.
And surprisingly, I'm okay with that.
What I do know is that I want to look back with Rob and Miriam and be able to say three simple words:
We made it!
Not necessarily because everything turned out exactly as we planned.
But because we kept going. We grew. We learned. We made adjustments. We found happiness along the way.
And we didn't let the difficult chapters define the rest of our story.
I'm not willing to sacrifice my family's happiness or my own in pursuit of some imaginary version of success.
As long as we have each other, we'll keep working toward whatever our version of making it becomes.
There's Still So Much Life to Live
If there's one thing I hope someone takes away from reading this, it's that you don't have to have everything figured out to keep moving forward.
You don't have to be where you thought you'd be by a certain age.
You don't have to be perfect.
And you certainly don't have to give up on the life you want simply because the road has been harder than you expected.
Find out who you are. Pursue your passions. Enjoy the little things. Invest in yourself and the person you're becoming.
Even the difficult, frustrating, trying times can teach us something about our strength and resilience.
You only get this one life to live.
Make the most of it, whatever that looks like for you.
So here I am. Fifty years old.
Not exactly where I thought I'd be.
But stronger, wiser, more comfortable with who I am, and still very much a work in progress.
And you know what?
I'm looking forward to discovering who I'll become next. ❤️
